A man comes into a pub, sits down at the bar and orders a beer. The bar keeper brings him his beer. After he has drunk it, he grabs in his bag and puts a small piano on the bar, grabs in his bag and puts a small chair on the bar and grabs a third time in his bag and sits down a small man on that chair.
And the small man plays piano very well, a the most beatyful music they've ever heared. After he's finished, everyone applauds. And the bar keeper asks the man: "Where do you have it from? It's so wonderful."
And the man said: "I own an dgini-lamp. And so I got this by a wish of mine. Hey," he said to the bar keeper, "do you have a wish? You can wish you everything!
"Me?", the bar keeper asks. "I have a wish for free? Coo-ool." Ok, no sooner said than done, the man grabs in his bag and gets out from it the meant lamp. He rubs at the side of the lamp and the dgini appeares: "Ok, budy. You have one wish for free." And the bar keeper says: "I wanna have one million dollars!" The dgini snap one's fingers and disapperes, and all over the bottom are dugs. Small, yellow cackling dugs. And the bar keeper said to the man: "But I wanna have dollars, not dugs." And the man: "Do you really think, I've asked for a 12 inches pianist?"
Q: What's the main difference between intelligence and ignorance?
A: I don't know and I don't care!
Q: What's the difference between a laywer and a vulture?
A: Laywer aren't an endangerd species.
Q: How many paranoic people does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Who want's to know?
Q: Why don't epileptics order Cokes at McDonalds?
A: They have the shakes instead.
Q: What's the difference between a jar of afterbirth and a jar of sand?
A: You can't gargle sand.
Q: How do you get 5 babies in a shoebox?
A: With cuisinart.
Q: Why should you put a baby in a blender feet first?
A: To see the expression on its face.
Q: Why do dogs lick their balls?
A: Because they can.
