Doctor : A person who kills your ills by pills, and later kills you with his bills.
Boss : Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
Tears : The hydraulic force by which masculine will power is defeated by feminine water power.
Atom Bomb : An invention to end all inventions.
Rumour : News that travels more than the speed of sound.
Classic : A book which people praise, but do not read.
Dictionary : The only place where divorce comes before marriage.
Marriage : It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelors degree and woman gains her masters.
Father : A banker provided by nature.
Politician : One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence after.
Smile : A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
Diplomat : A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.
Etc : A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
Committee : Individuals who can do nothing individually, sit to decide that nothing can be done together.
IT Professional : One who is paid for sending and receiving such Emails!
Cigarette : A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool at the other.
Love affairs : Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a five day test.
Divorce : Future tense of marriage.
Lecture : An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either".
Conference : The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.
Compromise : The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.
Conference Room : A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on.
Ecstasy : A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.
Classic : A book which people praise, but do not read.
Smile : A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
Office : A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
Yawn : The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.
Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.
Experience : The name men give to their mistakes.
Philosopher : A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.
Opportunist : A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.
Optimist : A person who while falling from Eiffel Tower says in midway "See I am not injured yet."
Pessimist :- A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO, Instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY.
Miser : A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.
Criminal : A guy no different from the rest... except that he got caught.
Politician : One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.
Employee : One who gets paid for reading such mails......
ETC: End of thinking capacity.